Diabetes Whodunnit: Kill Me Madam, Part 1-3

Divabetic’s Hallmark-style Mystery podcast Kill Me Madam, Part 1-3 is available for free on-demand. Enjoy great diabetes information and advice packed into a Whodunnit!:

There’s a good indication that murder might be part of the recipe when Nantucket’s ten-time reigning Baking Champion’s last name is ‘Coffin’. But resentment, greed, and Britannia’s own bad dealings turn everyone into a suspect when she’s found dead in the parking lot just before the Annual Decadents on Deck! Bake Off competition is about to kick off.

Delusional baker and amateur sleuth Mr. Divabetic is even shocked to find himself being treated as a suspect in the case by the local police after meeting her just once! As if his life wasn’t crazy enough before, escaping a murderous mishap in New York and attempting a fresh start in Nantucket has become a complete and utter baking disaster.

Now Max, along with his friends and nosy mother, have to add tracking down a murderer to his To-Do list, as well. Can our team hunt down the real murderer before they strike again? Will he become the next victim? Can Max ever manage to bake an actually edible cake?

FEATURING Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek, USA Best-Selling Author Tonya Kappes, Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE, MaryAnn Horst-Nicolay MEd, NDRT, Lorraine Brooks, Catherine Schuller, Wendy Radford, Coach The Cure’s Trisha Artman, Mama Rose Marie, and Seveda Williams. Produced by Leisa Chester-Weir.

If you’re craving a slice of key lime pie after listening to Divabetic Mystery podcast, then why try to easy-to-make recipe by our friend, Stacey Harris aka (The Diabetic Pastry Chef) After being diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, Stacey Harris (The Diabetic Pastry Chef) taught herself how to make pound cake, pecan rolls, pies, muffins, cupcakes, and other baked goods with about half the carbs you’d get from a traditional bakery item.

Sugar-Free Key Lime Pie Recipe by The Diabetic Pastry Chef

Ingredients

One 9″ pie crust, baked (traditional or graham cracker crust)
3 large eggs
1 c. granulated Whey Low®, Splenda® or Truvia® sugar substitute
1 c. half & half
2 Tbsp. cornstarch
3/4 c. key lime juice
1 Tbsp. finely grated lime zest
1/8 tsp. salt
whipped cream

FULL RECIPE

Join the happy healthcare host, Mr. Divabetic for this free, fun Virtual Baking Party with special guest, Stacey Harris aka The Diabetic Pastry Chef on Thursday, September 23, 7 – 8 PM, EST on Zoom.

FREE PROGRAM -REGISTER NOW

Divabetic Reader #2: Nancy Thayer’s Family Reunion

On the heels of reading Viola Shipman’s The Summer Cottage and Nancy Thayer’s Family Reunion books back to back, I noticed two trends. First, readers are obsessed with stories about homes located in idyllic spots like Nantucket and Lake Michigan. Second, authors go to extreme lengths, not to mention the protagonist’s size.

Now, I like nothing more than watching a new homeowner knock down a retaining wall to open up space on HGTV but still, I get easily bored reading about an actual house like its the main character. I imagine that we all have a natural curiosity to know what type of people living in white elephants and cottages on the coastlines of oceans and lakes. Or even in the garden districts of cities like Savannah, Charleston, and New Orleans.  In both novels, the protagonists’ family have owned their property for several decades. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t mind inheriting beachfront property either, regardless of the home’s condition. However, I would hope owning a home wouldn’t be my only claim to fame or strongest personality trait.

Regarding the second issue, the ambiguous shape and size of protagonists in fiction. Several authors have mentioned their publishers have pressured them about the size and shape of the protagonists on Divabetic’s monthly podcast. Publishers either want authors to describe the protagonists in general terms or make their protagonists smaller in shape and size. For example, one author interviewed told me that her publisher forced her to make her size 18 protagonist a size 12. She stated that her publisher didn’t think it was believable for a size 18 woman to have a romantic life.

I admit that I found Viola Shipman and Nancy Thayer’s ambiguous references to their protagonists’ size distracting. Descriptions of both main characters lead the reader to believe their beautiful. Both characters also express their own dissatisfaction with their bodies too. But that’s about the extent of it. Both authors’ avoidance seems downright obvious. So what is the big deal? There are plenty of women who looks like the cast of ‘Sex & The City’ but still manage to have active, fulfilling sex lives.

A widow over seventy starting to date again is an exciting story regardless of her size! However, if I had a clearer picture of what she looked like, I think I would have enjoyed reading more about Eleanor’s dating adventures.

Strangely, there are many mentions of her displeasure with the softness of her upper arms but nothing else.

Eleanor struggles with her energy level, and lack of focus, and coping with financial matters as she ages.

A lot of Family Reunion is about accepting the aging process.  I found these passages to honest and heartfelt. Here’s a quick synopsis:

Eleanor Sunderland loves living on Nantucket, in a gorgeous cliffside home that has been in her family for decades. Yet this year she can’t help but feel a bit isolated, even as the island begins to come alive with summer tourists and travelers. Her best friend has skipped town on a last-minute cruise, leaving Eleanor feeling lonely and nostalgic about her family’s weekend trips to the island, made less frequently in the years since her husband’s passing. Now, her money-driven children contact her mostly to complain and to beg her to sell her beloved home for a steep payout. Hoping to kick the season off on a good note, Eleanor decides her seventieth birthday may be the perfect occasion for a much-needed reunion.

Fresh off the heels of her college graduation, Eleanor’s dear granddaughter, Ari, has just ended an engagement that felt less like true love and more like a chore. She longs for a change of scenery and to venture far from her parents’ snobbish expectations. Taking advantage of her newfound freedom, she heads to Nantucket to clear her head before graduate school, moving in with her grandmother and taking a job at the local beach camp. As she watches Eleanor begin to form a bond with an old acquaintance, Ari herself becomes completely smitten with a friend’s charming older brother. But just as grandmother and granddaughter fall into a carefree routine, a few shocking discoveries throw them off course, and their ideas of the future seem suddenly uncertain.

Eleanor and Ari make exciting connections, old and new, over the course of an unpredictable, life-changing few months, and learn to lean on each other through every new challenge they face in life and love, in this tale filled with Nancy Thayer’s signature Nantucket magic.

Here’s what we were snacking on while reading Family Reunion. Grilled romaine lettuce, with tomato and topped with Tabitha Brown‘s carrot bacon. Added a little olive oil to make a simple marinade for the dressing.

Tabitha Brown is an American actress and social media personality. She creates online video content incorporating veganism, humor, and motivational speaking. Brown has over four million followers on TikTok and over three million followers on Instagram as of July 2021.

Check out Tabitha Brown’s favorite bacon substitute is Carrot Bacon! 

https://www.facebook.com/ActressTabithaBrown/videos/217570532863818/

 

As for her advice for others who are considering starting a vegan diet, Brown recently told our sister magazine Health that “food can be medicine, or it can be the thing that puts us in the ground…You have to start with your ‘why.’ My why was that I was sick. My why was life or death. I chose life,” Brown said. Sure, it will be challenging at first. “Do I still get cravings? Yeah, girl, right now I could see myself dipping a crab leg into some butter. But my why is strong enough. I say: ‘Be easy on yourself. Take your time. Don’t be hard on yourself. The world is hard enough already.'” Truer words have never been spoken, Tab.

 

Divabetic Cozy Mystery: Kill Me Madam, Part 9

Looks like someone is coming but it’s too late to save Max. Millicent Merriweather turns around, intending to shoot our approaching team, but her numbed feet cause her to trip over a nail sticking out of the rotting deck. Peggy rushes forward and holds Millicent down as she tries to stand up. In the tussle, the stolen pearl handled pistol skids across the deck and Mama Rose Marie grabs it and points it at Millicent.  

Mama Rose Marie: Where is my son?

Millicent: Swimming with the fishes.

Peggy: That’s not possible. He can’t be dead. I put blanks in that pistol after I found it behind Millicent’s cash register. Millicent is always threatening to kill anyone who uses a Groupon. There’s no way she should have access to a loaded gun.

Tonya: Look, there he is!

Narrator:  Max’s head bobs up in the water. After climbing up the ladder, he is toweling off on deck.

Mama Rose Marie: Thank Goodness, you’re safe. Once you dry off, Bartholomew, you’ll be as good as new.

Max:  New? Never. Different? Maybe. I’m not going to pretend to be someone else to win a contest. From now on, I’m staying true to who I am no matter how the chips may fall.

Tonya: Don’t you mean no matter how the dead bodies may fall?

Peggy: I’ve got some good news. We have a new Decadent Desserts on Deck Champion.

Max: I …I won?

Tonya: What? Was everyone else disqualified?

Peggy: I’m sorry Max – you never finished making your pie, so you WERE disqualified. But I think this check just might make up for it. Does this lift your spirits?

Max: Wow, what’s this for?

Peggy: Think of it as an advance on future pie orders. Your vegan key lime pie made with cashews and a pecan pie crust is such an interesting twist on the traditional recipe that I want to offer it to my customers.

Patricia: My patients who switch to vegan diets see their blood pressure decrease as well as their risk for heart disease.

MaryAnn: Max, you did it! You finally sold a recipe! Let’s celebrate.

Tonya: Hold your horses. We still haven’t found the stolen whales’ teeth!

Peggy: Loretta told me she hasn’t had any luck finding them.

Max: Mom, why do you have a funny look on your face?

Mama Rose Marie: We need to go check the oven.

Max: In the prep kitchen? But I turned it off before we left this morning.

Mama Rose Marie: No, no, not that oven! C’mon. Follow me.

Narrator: Mama Rose Marie leads our team back to the fabled Hussey mansion overhanging the Nantucket Sound. 

SOUND EFFECT: Sea gulls

Mama Rose Marie: Peggy, didn’t you say Britannia won ten First Place ribbons with her winning pie crust? Is that right?

Peggy: Do you mean what I said about ‘blind baking’?

Max: Mom, what do her baking skills have to do with the whales’ teeth?

Mama Rose Marie: Tanya, open that oven door.

Tonya: Well, I’ll be. The stolen whales’ teeth are right here in Britannia’s pie crusts!

Peggy: Only Britannia would think to hide them there. Let me call Loretta.

Patricia: Max, please don’t get any ideas about adding whales’ teeth to your next gluten free recipe!

MaryAnn: By the look on his face. I think he’s seriously considering it.

Max: No! Look at Peggy’s check. It’s the exact amount of the entry fee for the baking contest in Martha’s Vineyard.

Mama Rose Marie: How can you think of entering another baking contest after what happened?

Max: We don’t have any choice. I gave Britannia all my cash for the food processor and I maxed out my credit cards on these pirate costumes.

Patricia: You mean we’re stuck here?

Tonya: Yippee! I’m ready to sink my teeth into another murder!

MaryAnn: Let’s just cash the check and go home.

Max: But I can make a lot more money winning the grand prize in Martha’s Vineyard with a new recipe! How about a rhubarb quinoa brownie?

Mama Rose Marie: Oh, no, here we go again!

Narrator: Another mystery solved by our crack team of amateur sleuths. We’ve all learned a few things from this story.  Running away from your diabetes-related problems can lead to bigger issues. Any warning signs that something’s not right concerning your diabetes health should not be ignored.

We are always grateful to Sony Music for allowing us to feature their music. Tonight’s music was from the original Broadway recording of ‘Call Me Madam’ starring Dinah Shore. 

 

Divabetic Cozy Mystery: Kill Me Madam, Part 8

Narrator: With no time to spare before the competition’s official start, Max hurries below deck to retrieve his food processor.

SOUND EFFECT: footstep (man clopping) 

Narrator: Making his way back to the deck, Max is ambushed by a woman who is blocking his path.  It’s the stylish Millicent Merriweather.  And she’s holding the stolen pearl handled pistol.

Millicent: Stop right there and hand over that box!

Max: This box? It’s just a kitchen appliance! Granted it has 8 speeds and reversible blades but still –

Millicent:  I saw you handing cash to Britannia for that food processor in the parking lot after you left without buying anything. I searched Britannia’s trunk after I ran her over and the whales’ there weren’t there.  The only place they can be is in that box.

Max: So that’s why Britannia put those Botox receipts in my pocket. She was warning me about you. They’re yours! You get Botox shots to numb your feet so you can wear sky high heels.

Millicent: It’s a small price to pay for how great my legs look in these Manolo Blahniks. Now this gun is going to eliminate another source of my pain.

Max: Wait! Those heels don’t have any scuff marks. If a robber had dragged you into the storeroom then there would at least be scuff marks or a broken heel.

Millicent: Yes, Captain Obvious, I faked the robbery to give me an alibi. Britannia Coffin betrayed me. I had no choice but to kill her. We planned this heist for months. She couldn’t pull it off alone in her condition. We agreed she would get the insurance money and I would sell the teeth to the highest bidder. I even had a buyer lined up but then she went behind my back and made a deal herself.

Max: That’s why you killed her?

Millicent: The retail business is dead thanks to Amazon. Those whales’ teeth were my ticket to a new life. After she came into my shop this morning and didn’t bring me the whales’ teeth like we’d agreed, I thought Britannia might be planning to double cross me. That’s when I called the buyer and found out she’d made a new deal with him and had cut me out. Then I remembered seeing her give you that box in the parking lot. I was heading over to her house to confront her when I saw her coming out of the Treasure Island Antique Shoppe. I just saw red!!! She was an easy target without her poles.

Max: You won’t get away with this. My friends are probably already looking for me.

Millicent: Open that box and give me what’s inside!

Max: Look! It’s only a food processor.

Millicent: I can’t see. Move your mangy stuffed parrot out of my way. Where are they?

Max: I swear I don’t know.  I don’t have them. But why don’t you let me help you find them?

Millicent: Not unless they are at the bottom of the ocean. Let’s go, Jolly Roger!

Max: No, you don’t want to do this!

Millicent: You know too much! I’m going to make you walk the plank like in one of those old pirate movies. You’re already dressed for the part.

Max: You do know I can swim, right?

Millicent: Not with a bullet in you. Goodbye, Captain Bartholomew Maxwell!

SOUND EFFECT: gun shot and splash

Narrator: Max falls headfirst into the ocean with his food processor.

TO BE CONTINUED 

Divabetic’s Mystery podcast, Kill Me Madam, cast includes USA Best-Selling Author Tonya Kappes, Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE, MaryAnn Horst-Nicolay MEd, NDRT, Lorraine Brooks, Catherine Schuller, Wendy Radford, Coach The Cure‘s Trisha Artman, Mama Rose Marie, Seveda Williams, and Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek. Produced by Leisa Chester-Weir.

Throughout the podcast we will be featuring music from the Broadway Cast Album of ‘Call Me Madam’ courtesy of SONY Music.

 

Looking for a fun way to socialize without putting your diabetes wellness at risk? Do you need a little help staying on track with your diabetes self-care?

Join the happy healthcare host, Mr. Divabetic for this free, fun Tea Party with special guests, Divabetic Image & Style Advisor Catherine Schuller, Tessie’s Teas’ owner Rose Hall and Harlem Heaven’s Hats owner Evetta Petty on Tuesday, November 17, 2020, 7 – 8 PM, EST on Zoom.

FREE REGISTER – REGISTER NOW 

Divabetic Cozy Mystery: Kill Me Madam, Part 7

With less than two hours before the official start of the competition, our amateur sleuths, attired in full pirate regalia, hurry to Britannia Coffin’s historic mansion on the cliff overlooking the ocean. They scramble over a wall of sandbags and enter through the unlocked back door.

Patricia: These gold framed portraits lining the hall must be the Hussey family ancestors.

Mama Rose Marie: And I’ll bet that room at the end of the hall is Britannia’s office.

Max: I can’t believe I let you talk me into coming here! If I get arrested, it’s all Renata Whisk’s fault!

Tonya: Renata Whisk didn’t buy the food processor – you did, Bartholomew!

Patricia: Well, Loretta is certain Britannia stole the whales’ teeth. If that’s true. They must be here somewhere.

MaryAnn: Let’s look around. Maybe they’re in one of these boxes?

Mama Rose Marie: This box is filled with insulin pens, vials and cartridges.

Max: Same with this one! Maybe she was planning to donate these supplies.

Patricia: New, unopened medical supplies can be donated to the regions impacted by natural disasters. But, you need to make sure they haven’t expired.

Tonya: Look, what’s in this box. It’s loaded with herbal medicines and supplements.

MaryAnn: It looks like she was searching for a quick fix to manage her neuropathy.

Max: She was probably hoping to use it during the competition to alleviate her foot pain.

MaryAnn: She wasted her money. There is no quick fix. The best way to help minimize pain is to stick to proper diabetes self-care management.

Mama Rose Marie: Well, we’ve searched all these boxes and there’s no sign of the whales’ teeth.

MaryAnn: Hold on, look what I found on her desk.  This stack of overdue bills explains why Britannia was so desperate for money. She must’ve spent close to a million dollars on sandbags, flood insurance and healthcare. It looks like Loretta was telling us the truth about Britannia’s money problems.

Mama Rose Marie: Hmmm, the high costs of healthcare seems unavoidable. What can you do?

Patricia: Make certain you understand all your healthcare benefits. Many people don’t know what their plans will and will not cover until it’s too late.

Max: Yeah, but check out this card I just found. It says, “This year you’ll be the one dying with envy!” And look,  it is signed by Loretta.

Patricia: That sounds like a death threat to me.

Max: Geez, some people will do just about anything to win a baking competition!

Tonya: Talk about the pot calling the kettle black!

SOUND EFFECT: Footsteps (shorter) needs a crash 

Mama Rose Marie: Shush! Everyone be quiet. I think I hear someone in the hall.

Loretta:  What’s going on?  How did you get in here?

Tonya: Loretta! We can ask you the same question. You scared us half to death.

Loretta: I’m looking for the stolen whales’ teeth. I’m certain Britannia stole them to collect on the insurance.

Tonya: Well, they’re not here.

Loretta: Why should I believe you? Look at you, you’re dressed as pirates. For all I know, you helped Britannia steal the whales’ teeth.

Max: No! I’m just a baking competitor.

Tonya: You see “Bartholomew” here has a bad habit of being in the right place at the wrong time when someone gets murdered. But he’s perfectly harmless. We’re trying to solve Britannia’s murder so the police don’t arrest him.

Loretta: Then the police need to interrogate Goldie Highcastle. Britannia couldn’t have robbed the museum by herself. There are too many stairs. She had to have an accomplice.

Tonya: You think Goldie helped Britannia rob the museum?

Loretta: Britannia asked Goldie if she knew of any tycoons interested in buying ivory when we were in her store this morning.

Max: Was she talking about the whales’ teeth?

Loretta: What else? Like I said earlier, those ivory teeth are worth $5 million dollars.

Tonya: That gives Goldie another motive for murder!

Loretta: I wouldn’t put it past her. Goldie makes a living profiting off other people’s misfortunes. She probably helped Britannia steal the whales’ teeth and then killed her so she could keep the money all to herself!

Max: So … You DIDN’T kill Britannia to win the baking competition?

Loretta: You must be joking! I had to withdraw from the competition this morning to search for the whales’ teeth. But if they’re not here, where else can they be?

SOUND EFFECT: Phone rings  

Max: Hello? This is Ma-x, I mean Max-well. Bartholomew Ma –. What’s up? (Pause) Oh no! That’s terrible.

Tonya: Another murder?

Max: Worse. The finals are about to start, and I still need to finish making my pie!

TO BE CONTINUED 

Divabetic’s Mystery podcast, Kill Me Madam, cast includes USA Best-Selling Author Tonya Kappes, Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE, MaryAnn Horst-Nicolay MEd, NDRT, Lorraine Brooks, Catherine Schuller, Wendy Radford, Coach The Cure‘s Trisha Artman, Mama Rose Marie, Seveda Williams, and Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek. Produced by Leisa Chester-Weir.

Throughout the podcast we will be featuring music from the Broadway Cast Album of ‘Call Me Madam’ courtesy of SONY Music.

 

Looking for a fun way to socialize without putting your diabetes wellness at risk? Do you need a little help staying on track with your diabetes self-care?

Join the happy healthcare host, Mr. Divabetic for this free, fun Tea Party with special guests, Divabetic Image & Style Advisor Catherine Schuller, Tessie’s Teas’ owner Rose Hall and Harlem Heaven’s Hats owner Evetta Petty on Tuesday, November 17, 2020, 7 – 8 PM, EST on Zoom.

FREE REGISTER – REGISTER NOW 

 

Divabetic Cozy Mystery: Kill Me Madam, Part 5

Our team of amateur sleuths, Tonya Kappes, Mama Rose Marie, Patricia Addie-Gentle, MaryAnn Nicolay and Mr. Divabetic, heads to the Hawden House Museum to meet Loretta Hussey.  

The beautiful Hawden House museum is housed in a Greek Revival mansion that was built by whaling merchant and silver retailer William Hawden. Its collection highlights the history of Nantucket through the whaling and trading industries. (Closed for the 2020 season. All Historic Property grounds and gardens are open to the public and accessible during daylight hours.)

Loretta: Hey you in the pirate costume. Put on this sandwich board to help us advertise admission.

Max: Me? Why?

Loretta: Aren’t you from the temp agency to help us sell tickets!  All the whales’ teeth in our collection have been stolen. Tourists will stop coming when they find out our biggest attraction is gone!!

The first floor at the Hadwen House showcases the Nantucket Historical Association’s decorative arts. The very finest objects in the collection are on display in period rooms showcasing furniture, china and ceramics, textiles, and silver.

Tonya: Don’t you think your tourism will be more affected by Britannia Coffin’s murder?

Loretta: That woman! She’s always blamed me for what my great grandfather did.

Max: What did he do?

Loretta: According to Britannia he was responsible for the loss of her family’s whaleship Essex that left them penniless. I think she’s the one who stole the scrimshaw whales’ teeth. It makes perfect sense. They belonged to her!

Scrimshaw is the art of engraving images on ivory—whale teeth and bone and walrus tusks—a folk art practiced by men aboard whaleships during the nineteenth century. Sailors made scrimshaw in an amazing variety, including decorative objects, utilitarian devices, and jewelry. It is one of the earliest recognized American crafts and remains one of the most highly desired forms of folk art for collectors of Americana.

Max: Then why would she steal them?

Loretta: To collect the insurance money. She came in earlier today with some flimsy excuse about not liking how the whales’ teeth were displayed. She made me open the case so she could rearrange them. I’m sure she saw where I kept the keys.

Tonya: So why did you threaten her at The Kitchen Island store this morning? Didn’t you tell Britannia she would get what she deserved?

Loretta: Oh, that. I meant the baking competition. She was going to lose this time. That’s all.

Max: Really? After beating you ten times?

Loretta: Look, I’m not the only one happy that Britannia Coffin is dead. Goldie almost went bankrupt! She had so many legal bills from fighting that slip and fall scheme cooked up by Britannia and Peggy’s husband, Floyd.

Tonya: But wasn’t Britannia rich?

Loretta: Not anymore. Her last ditch efforts to save my family’s home from toppling into the Atlantic Ocean cost her a pretty penny.

Max: Peggy told us climate change was affecting the lobster business, but I didn’t realize it was also eroding the shoreline.

Loretta: It took my old neighbor’s house falling into the ocean for her to finally take action.

MaryAnn: She sounds like a lot of people living with diabetes. They put off managing their blood sugars until after they experience a serious health-related complication.

Loretta: Britannia’s problems were all her own fault! She just sat up in her house scheming and baking pie after pie after pie. Her sweet tooth led straight to her diabetes!

MaryAnn: That’s a myth! Eating too much sugar doesn’t cause diabetes. Diabetes is caused by something disrupting the body’s ability to turn the food you eat into energy.

Patricia: Couldn’t they move her house farther back from the cliff?  To save it?

Loretta: Moving a large foundation like that is very expensive. It would cost millions of dollars!

Tonya: Aren’t those stolen whales’ teeth worth millions of dollars?

Loretta: They are insured for $5 million dollars to be exact. They are scrimshaw whales’ teeth intricately carved by the famous artist Frederick Myrick.

The Nantucket Historical Association‘s scrimshaw collection is considered one of the most important collections in the world. Highlights of the collection include some of the earliest and rarest sperm whale teeth, engraved by the most famous of all scrimshaw artists, Nantucketers Frederick Myrick and Edward Burdett.

Mama Rose Marie: Well, something as big and unique as that shouldn’t be too hard to find.

Loretta: Oh no, they are smaller than you think. Some are no larger than this dinner plate from our historical collection.

Max: You mean that’s not a dessert plate you’re holding? It’s so small.

Patricia: American dinner plates have gotten much larger over the years along just like portion sizes.

MaryAnn: Plate size and portion size go hand in hand. Using smaller plates is a great tactic for eating less!

Tonya: Alright, let’s get back to the robbery and the murder – are the whales’ teeth the only things missing?

Loretta: No, a pearl handled pistol was also taken. You certainly have a lot of questions.

Tonya: We’re helping the police piece together a timeline for the murder.

Loretta: I heard the police are looking for some strange guy who was in the parking lot. Apparently, he might be the killer! Hold on, let me get that police sketch.

Mama Rose Marie: Oh, Bartholomew, look at the time!! We have to get to the boat for the baking competition.

TO BE CONTINUED 

Divabetic’s Mystery podcast, Kill Me Madam, cast includes USA Best-Selling Author Tonya Kappes, Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE, MaryAnn Horst-Nicolay MEd, NDRT, Lorraine Brooks, Catherine Schuller, Wendy Radford, Coach The Cure‘s Trisha Artman, Mama Rose Marie, Seveda Williams, and Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek. Produced by Leisa Chester-Weir.

Throughout the podcast we will be featuring music from the Broadway Cast Album of ‘Call Me Madam’ courtesy of SONY Music.

RELATED DIABETES WELLNESS  INFORMATION

The Diabetes Plate Method is an easy “formula” that helps you eat right with every bite. READ MORE
The plate method is a simple, visual way to make sure you get enough non-starchy vegetables and lean protein, and limit the amount of higher-carb food that has the greatest potential to spike your blood sugar. READ MORE
How to practice portion size. Your fist is roughly the size of a cup or a medium-size piece of fruit, such as an apple. When it comes to lean protein, the palm of your hand (without the fingers) equates to about 3 ounces of meat, seafood, or poultry. READ MORE

Divabetic Cozy Mystery: Kill Me Madam, Part 4

Before Millicent Merriweather can get a good look at Max, our team dashes out the door and runs across the parking lot to the Treasure Island Antique Shoppe, where the owner, Goldie Highcastle, is busy sweeping up shards of broken porcelain from the floor.

SOUND EFFECT: store bells

Goldie: Ahoy Maties! Welcome to Treasure Island Antique Shoppe: the finest heirlooms from the Seven Seas, at rock bottom prices guaranteed. Hey, how about a sword to go with your outfit, Mr. Tall, Dark and Haggard?

Tonya: Actually, we’re here about the murder.  Did you see what happened? Your store is awfully close to where they found Britannia Coffin’s body.

Goldie: I didn’t see a thing. But Britannia did come in here earlier. She brought me this box of sugar substitute as a peace offering. She said it spiked her blood sugars, I wonder if that’s true?

MaryAnn: Artificial sweeteners generally don’t raise blood sugars. But research shows that they can change gut bacteria with prolonged use. And that can lead to weight gain.

Goldie: Really? Why is that?

MaryAnn: Gut bacteria in your intestines digests foods and produces chemicals to help you feel full.

Patricia: Artificial sweeteners can also change your taste preferences over time increasing your desire for sweets. Lowering your stress levels and staying hydrated can help.

Goldie: But if I like something sweet. What else can I use instead of this sugar substitute?

MaryAnn: Try a plant-based sugar alternative like Stevia. Or for a little sweetness add cinnamon, especially in coffee.

Tonya: Can we get back to Britannia? Why was she here?

Goldie: Oh right, she brought in a box of things she wanted me to sell on consignment. Some of Loretta Hussey’s family antiques. I didn’t see anything I liked so she said she’d go home and come back with more.

Tonya: And what time did she come back?

Goldie: Sooner than I hoped for. All hell broke loose when she got back. Loretta Hussey was in here looking at my collection of cat o’ nine tales! I don’t know who she was planning to flog.

Mama Rose Marie: Oh, my!

Goldie: Britannia walked in smiling like a Cheshire cat. It’s as if she knew Loretta would be here. Britannia Coffin loved making Loretta’s life miserable.

Tonya: What happened?

Goldie: Well! When Loretta saw her father’s prized porcelain lobster claw was in the box of things Britannia had brought me to sell, she went berserk. She snatched it out of the box and started running for the door. Britannia tripped her with her poles and started whacking Loretta with them. But, one of her poles hit the lobster claw and shattered it into a million pieces. Loretta looked like she wanted to kill her.

Mama Rose Marie: That seems like an overreaction.

Goldie: The next thing I knew Britannia Coffin was dead.

Max: Wait, aren’t those Britannia’s walking poles in your umbrella stand? She left without them?

Goldie: Look, I had to stop her from breaking everything in the store. I wrestled them away from her.

SOUND EFFECT: Phone rings

Goldie: Excuse me. Hello, Treasure Island Antiques Shoppe where you’ll find the finest heirlooms from the Seven … Oh no! Loretta, that’s horrible!!! (to them) I can’t believe it! There’s been another robbery. Someone broke into the Hawden House Museum across the street!

TO BE CONTINUED 

 

Divabetic’s Mystery podcast, Kill Me Madam, cast includes USA Best-Selling Author Tonya Kappes, Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE, MaryAnn Horst-Nicolay MEd, NDRT, Lorraine Brooks, Catherine Schuller, Wendy Radford, Coach The Cure‘s Trisha Artman, Mama Rose Marie, Seveda Williams, and Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek. Produced by Leisa Chester-Weir.

Throughout the podcast we will be featuring music from the Broadway Cast Album of ‘Call Me Madam’ courtesy of SONY Music.

Divabetic Cozy Mystery: Kill Me Madam, Part 3

Britannia Coffin’s death was NO accident. The police have determined that she was murdered! Britannia’s body was discovered near the dumpster in The Kitchen Island parking lot, and it was covered in cash! Apparently, the store was also robbed. The police found Millicent Merriweather, the Kitchen Island store shop owner, locked in the storeroom. The store’s cash register had also been emptied. 

This is big news! The death of a member of one of Nantucket’s founding families coupled with this robbery has the whole town buzzing. And everyone, except Max, is glued to the TV and radio for the latest updates. 

Max: Oh, well, I bet  the competition is going to be canceled. We’d better pack up and head back to New York.

Tonya: Max, we can’t leave now. You might have been the last person to see Britannia Coffin alive.

MaryAnn: That’s true. An eyewitness reported seeing a suspicious man with Britannia in the parking lot right before she was killed. The police think he’s the murderer!

Patricia: That sounds like it could be you!

Max: But I’m innocent.

Mama Rose Marie: Son, if you are a suspect in one more murder, we’re going to have to buy a getaway car!

Patricia: Hey, Max, what are those receipts sticking out of your pocket?

MaryAnn: Let me see, this one’s an herbal pain reliever. They seem harmless on TV but they can interact with other medications and cause problems.

Patricia: I advise my patients to always consult with their doctors before buying them.

MaryAnn: And this receipt is for Botox injections.

Max: What? That’s not mine. I don’t know where that came from.

Patricia: Botox isn’t just for wrinkles, silly. It’s also used to ease hand and foot pain caused by nerve damage. Given her health issues, it must be Britannia’s!

MaryAnn: There’s a list of dates, times and numbers on the back of this receipt. It looks like Britannia must’ve been logging her blood sugars.

Patricia: Good for her! Diabetes and data go hand in hand. Without data it’s hard to know what to change and where to focus on in your self-care management.

MaryAnn: Keeping your blood sugars within a range can help alleviate pain related to neuropathy.

Tonya: Wait! Maybe Britannia stuffed these receipts in your pocket on purpose. They’re clues! In my book, Fixin’ to Die, my character, Kenni Lowry nabs the culprits and solves the murder using clues just like these.

Mama Rose Marie: We should turn them over to the police.

Max: No, if we go to the police they’ll find out who I really am and then it will be all over the papers just like it was in New York.

MaryAnn: It’s a good thing you put on that pirate costume before anyone recognized you.

Max: This can’t be happening again. My baking career won’t survive another scandal.

Tonya: Then, our only option is to stay and solve this murder.

Max: Tonya. (pause)  I swear you left my food processor in New York just so something like this would happen.

Mama Rose Marie: Stop bickering you two and let’s put on our thinking caps. Max, who else was in the store when you were there?

Max: Just the owner and Britannia. Britannia was at the cash register when I walked in. Then, Britannia and I left together to go to her car.

Patricia: What about in the parking lot? Did you notice anything unusual?

Max: I got too distracted by all the shiny new food processors in her trunk. Oh, Wait!  As I was leaving, Britannia took a box out of the back seat and headed across the parking lot to the antique shop.

Tonya: What was in the box?

Max: I didn’t notice. I was in a hurry to get back to the prep kitchen.

MaryAnn: Hold on a second, didn’t Peggy tell us Britannia rarely left her house because of her neuropathy?

Patricia: She sure did!  Maybe Peggy lied to us to protect someone?

Tonya: You mean like her husband, Floyd? Peggy said his lobster business wasn’t doing well and the news reports  said Britannia Coffin was rich. Money is always the top motive for murder in my novels!

MaryAnn: Well, if Peggy wasn’t lying to us, then Britannia must have had a pretty compelling reason to leave her house this morning  if she was in pain.

Mama Rose Marie: Whatever’s in that box might tell us. We’d better head over to the antique shop and find out.

Max: No, no, no! This is exactly why I left New York. Please, I don’t want to get mixed up in any more murders.

Tanya: Too late. Let’s retrace your steps and get to the crime scene.

Narrator: Our team heads over to the Petticoat Row Shopping district where The Kitchen Island store is located. 

The women-run retail district, Petticoat Row, on Centre Street was an entirely post–Civil War institution, which developed in the 1860s and lasted into the 1930s. It comprised between two and twelve businesses at a time and involved about thirty female proprietors in all. While whaling created conditions that led some island women to enter the commercial sphere, it was actually the economic and population disruptions that followed the collapse of whaling that brought Nantucket women into the paid workforce in significant numbers.

The Kitchen Island is a quaint baking store packed with tableware, cooking tools, appliances and recipe books as well as delicious pastries. The stylish owner, who just happens to be one of the Decadent Desserts on Deck sponsors, is Millicent Merriweather. 

SOUND EFFECT: store bells

Narrator: After exchanging pleasantries, our team gets down to business with their investigation. 

Tonya:  Millicent, was Britannia in your store for any particular reason?

Millicent: She was bargain hunting for a new zester.

MaryAnn: If she loved a bargain, I’ll bet she also saved money by buying generic medications like Metformin for her diabetes. It’s just as safe and effective as the brand name but it costs a whole lot less.

Millicent: Oh who knows; all she wanted to talk about was entering her famous lemon meringue pie in today’s competition.

MaryAnn: Are you sure? The Perky Pie Princess told us Britannia had dropped out.

Millicent: And you believed Peggy? I wouldn’t trust anything she had to say about Britannia. Especially after what happened between them.

Max: I don’t trust her either after that crack she made calling me an amateur baker. But go on, tell us what happened?

Millicent: Peggy’s husband Floyd was involved in one of Britannia’s slip and fall scams. He lied on the stand. Britannia is the reason Floyd did jail time.

Mama Rose Marie: The big house really changes you; I should know.

Max:  Mom, what are you talking about? You were behind bars less than an hour.

Mama Rose Marie: Well, an hour in the pen feels like a lifetime.

Tonya: Do you two mind? Can Millicent finish what she was saying?

Millicent: Paying off the fines almost made Floyd lose the family’s lobster business. To make it worse, Britannia walked away scot free thanks to her high-powered lawyers.

Max: She sounds pretty devious to be scamming people with phony slip and fall lawsuits given her condition.

MaryAnn: Her neuropathy would make her more prone to fall. So how did they prove it was a scam?

Millicent: It turned out Britannia wasn’t using her Nordic poles that day like Floyd testified. The judge threw out the suit because Britannia hadn’t taken the necessary safety precautions.

Mama Rose Marie: Mmmm. My Bridge partner also suffers from neuropathy. Her doctor wants her to check her feet daily but she has difficulty bending over.

Patricia: Her doctor is concerned she could develop a bad infection if she cut her foot. A hand mirror can remedy that. By placing a mirror on the floor you can easily see the bottom of your feet.

Tonya: Anywho. . .was anyone else in the store with Britannia?

Millicent: Loretta Hussey. I overheard Britannia tell her to make room on her mantle for another second-place ribbon!

Patricia: Oooo! That must’ve made Loretta mad.

Tonya: Yeah, but mad enough to commit murder?

Millicent: She was furious. Britannia never missed an opportunity to ruffle Loretta’s feathers. Just last week Britannia announced she was going to sell all the Hussey family treasures. There’s motive enough for murder right there!

Patricia: What would give Britannia Coffin the right to sell Loretta Hussey’s family possessions?

Millicent: Britannia used to be married to Loretta’s older brother. She got the house and everything in it in the divorce settlement. Britannia was heartless. I heard Loretta say, “You’ll get what you deserve!” as she stormed out of my store.

Tonya: But wait! Wasn’t Britannia‘s murderer the same person who robbed you?

Millicent: Maybe – I did tell the police I saw a strange man in the parking lot right before Britannia was killed! He should be at the top of the list of suspects, right next to Loretta!

Max: Oh, no. That strange man had to be- (Tonya cuts me off)

Tonya: -Just one more question.

Millicent: Anything. The sooner Britannia’s killer is caught, the happier I’ll be.

Tonya: Can you think of anyone who would rob you?

Millicent: No. Like I told the police, whoever it was grabbed me from behind and in these high heels, I lost my balance and fell over. Next thing I knew, I was blindfolded and shoved in the stockroom.

Patricia: You know, flats are better for your back and your feet. No one needs to wear 5-inch heels.

Max: But those shoes ARE fabulous!!  Do they hurt?

Millicent: What can I say – “Pretty is Painful.” But wait, you look kind of familiar. I think I’ve seen you before. Take off that eye patch!

Mama Rose Marie: Oh, Bartholomew! Look at the time! You promised to take me to the antique shop across the parking lot. Let’s go!

TO BE CONTINUED 

 

Divabetic’s Mystery podcast, Kill Me Madam, cast includes USA Best-Selling Author Tonya Kappes, Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE, MaryAnn Horst-Nicolay MEd, NDRT, Lorraine Brooks, Catherine Schuller, Wendy Radford, Coach The Cure‘s Trisha Artman, Mama Rose Marie, Seveda Williams, and Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek. Produced by Leisa Chester-Weir.

Throughout the podcast we will be featuring music from the Broadway Cast Album of ‘Call Me Madam’ courtesy of SONY Music.

HEALTH TOPICS

A new study suggests that Botox, or botulinum toxin, may offer successful relief for neuropathy, not just one form, but two.

 

Divabetic Cozy Mystery: Kill Me Madam, Part 2

The island of Nantucket is known for its cobblestone streets and weathered grey-shingled cottages, but the island also distinguished itself for being the only place in the United States that was effectively run by women.

With their husbands out to sea for up to four years at a time, the whaling wives ran a variety of businesses located in the area known as Petticoat Row. 

Today Peggy’s Pie Shop is hosting an event for the contestants, and everyone, including Max and his pals, are eager to learn some tips that might improve their chances of winning. 

Peggy: Our goal this morning is to achieve the perfect pie crust. Too much mixing or over baking can ruin your creation. Baking is all about precision.

Tonya: So is Murder.

Max: Keep your voice down. She might hear you.

Peggy: Is there a question in the back?

Max: Yes, how can I stop my key lime pie crust from getting soggy?

Peggy:  Oh, that’s easy – you should use blind baking. Our Decadent Desserts on Deck reigning champion, Britannia Coffin, swears by it. Her award-winning pie crusts are never soggy.

Max: I’d better write this down. What is blind baking?

Peggy: Sometimes it’s called pre-baking, it’s the process of baking the pie crust without the filling. The trick is to  line the bottom of the crust with pie weights, it will prevent the pastry from puffing up in the oven.

Tonya: Excuse me, what did you say the champion’s last name is again?

Peggy: Coffin.  C-O-F-F-I-N.

Tonya: Holy Smokes, Max! I mean “Bartholomew.” This is your lucky day!

Peggy: Why’s that?

Tonya: “Bartholomew” here loves facing ‘STIFF’ competition!

Peggy: Sadly, Britannia’s not competing this year. But she has agreed to come, poles in tow, and crown our new champion.

Max: Oh, I think I met her! That sounds like the woman who sold me the food processor.

Peggy: I bet she loved your costume. She has a thing for Johnny Depp.

Max: Oh, no, I wasn’t wearing this when I met her. Why does she carry around ski poles?

Peggy: Actually, they are Nordic Walking poles. Britannia suffers from neuropathy due to her diabetes.  She uses the poles to help her maintain her balance.  Her constant pain makes her so irritable. She says it feels like she’s stepping on pins and needles when she walks.

Patricia: Chronic peripheral neuropathy is the most common diabetes health-related complication. High blood sugar levels cause damage to the nerves in the hands and feet.

MaryAnn: And it can affect every part of a person’s life; walking, sitting, and even sleeping.

Tonya: There must be something she can do.

MaryAnn: Well, believe it or not exercise can help.

Peggy: She’d laugh if you told her that. She barely leaves her home. Just standing is painful. That’s why she’s not competing this year. Are all of you competing?

Tonya: Oh no! We’re here to help Maa —- uh, “Bartholomew,” in case a dead body turns up. His baking is known for killing more than taste buds!

Peggy: Good heavens! (more shocked)

Max: Ignore her. She has a morbid sense of humor.

Peggy: We can use a few laughs. Everyone is shocked that Britannia is not defending her crown. Well, except for her arch rival, Loretta Hussey. She and her ten second-place ribbons are overjoyed!

Mama Rose Marie: Ten? Oh, that must be so frustrating to lose ten times to the same person.

Peggy: Their families have been feuding since Nantucket was the whaling capital of the world. Our yearly baking competition only fuels the fire.

Max: What about you? Are you entered?

Peggy: Ha! I’m a Professional baker. We are not allowed to compete. And anyway, I’ve got too many pie orders to fill. Right now, we really need the money. My husband Floyd’s lobster business is sinking fast and these weather conditions aren’t helping one bit.

Tonya: The storms must be really bad to scare away the lobsters.

Peggy: No, it’s the warming waters caused by climate change that are forcing our lobstermen out of business. Just like the petroleum industry destroyed whaling a century ago.

SOUND EFFECT: phone ring 

Peggy: Hello? Peggy The Perky Pie Prin- Wait, wait, what? Oh No! That’s horrible! Britannia Coffin is dead! What do you mean she was the victim of a hit and run accident?  In the Kitchen Island parking lot. Oh Dear! Now the whole competition is up in the air.

Divabetic’s Mystery podcast cast includes USA Best-Selling Author Tonya Kappes, Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE, MaryAnn Horst-Nicolay MEd, NDRT, Lorraine Brooks, Catherine Schuller, Wendy Radford, Coach The Cure’s Trisha Artman, Mama Rose Marie, Seveda Williams, and Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek. Produced by Leisa Chester-Weir.

Throughout the podcast we will be featuring music from the Broadway Cast Album of ‘Call Me Madam’ courtesy of SONY Music.

Divabetic Cozy Mystery: Kill Me Madam, Part 1

It’s a bright and sunny morning on the island of Nantucket, Massachusetts. Part of what makes Nantucket a unique historic gem is its place on the map; as Herman Melville wrote in Moby-Dick, it is “away offshore.” Max has just returned from running an errand to join his friends in a small prep kitchen overlooking the beach. He and our team are busy doing food prep for his new recipe for Nantucket’s Decadent Desserts on Deck Baking Competition. Everyone is hoping that Max will stay out of trouble long enough to win the cash prize with one of his healthy dessert recipes.  

Tonya: Hey Max, now that you’re back from your shopping errand, let’s take these aprons off and go sightseeing!

Max: There’s no time, I’ve got to prepare for the competition. Mom, can you turn on the oven?

Tonya: You mean we travelled all this way to Nantucket just to be stuck in a kitchen?

Patricia: He’s only here to escape the bad press surrounding Sweet Sally Buttercup’s murder.

MaryAnn: And to prove he’s a serious baker.

Mama Rose Marie: And not a deranged killer, isn’t that right, dear?

Max: Those wouldn’t be my exact words, Mom!

Tonya: Sweet Sally took one sip of your kale hot cocoa and dropped dead. Big deal!

Max: We’ve gone over this. It wasn’t me. A lunatic poisoned my kale hot cocoa. I didn’t kill her.

Tonya: Details, details. Why do you insist on splitting hairs? You’re notorious! There’s even a ‘Killer Cocoa’ Twitter account dedicated to your mishaps.

MaryAnn: Yeah, it has 5 million followers.

Max: That’s precisely why I registered under a different name: Bartholomew Maxwell. I’m keeping my true identity a secret so they’ll judge me on my recipe and not my ‘notorious’ reputation.

Patricia: Running away from your past is a big mistake. It always catches up with you.

MaryAnn: Besides, someone is bound to recognize you – your picture’s been all over the media.

Max: Not if I compete in this costume – dressed as a pirate.

Patricia: Wait a minute! You think changing your name and wearing that stuffed parrot on your shoulder along with that eye patch, wig and beard can keep you out of trouble?

Max: It couldn’t hurt. My Fruit Suit is like a magnet for murder! Besides this competition is on an old pirate ship. I’ll blend in.

Mama Rose Marie: Son, you have finally lost your marbles. What do you think, Tonya?

Tonya: I think if he’s going to walk around dressed like Blackbeard, we should all get to dress up and change our names. This recipe of yours better be dee-licious.

Max: I’m packing all the flavor of a classic key lime pie into my dairy and gluten free, vegan recipe with a pecan pie crust!

Patricia: Smart ingredients! Pecans are low in carbs and can also reduce the risk of heart disease.

MaryAnn: Plus, they’re high in fiber and contain lots of vitamins and minerals.

Tonya: First of all, Max, it’s “pecawns” not “peecans”. And, it sounds way too healthy to win a Decadent Dessert competition.

Patricia: Well, many desserts contain butter and dark chocolate which are low in carbohydrates.

MaryAnn: But they can also have loads of sugar and flour, which are high in carbohydrates. There are healthy carbs—ones that are high in fiber and low in sugar, like fruits and vegetables—and then, the not-so-healthy carbs.

Tonya: What about rice, potatoes and flour? My sister-in-law won’t go near any white foods.

MaryAnn: Rice, potatoes and flour can still be part of a healthy diet. The key is moderation. And potato skins are a great source of potassium and fiber.

Max: Who cares about potato skins?  My pie crust is made out of finely chopped pecans that are loaded with nutrients. That’s why I ran out to buy a food processor. It’s going to help cut down on my prep time.

Tonya: You didn’t wear this disguise out in public, did you?

Max: No, I stopped by a costume shop on my way back. Luckily no one recognized me at the local baking store. You wouldn’t believe the outrageous prices!  Good thing, I got a deal. Actually it’s a weird story. This eccentric lady with ski poles sold me this brand new food processor right out of her trunk.

Mama Rose Marie: What was she doing with ski poles in the middle of summer!?

Max: Beats me. But she was a real lifesaver! Since someone, dropped voice (Tonya!) forgot to pack mine!

Tonya: Eccentric sounds about right if she was selling food processors out of her trunk!

Max: She told me she wins a new one every year in the Decadents Dessert competition. Enough chit chat. I’ve got to soak these cashews for the pie filling before we leave.

Tonya: You mean we finally get to explore the island, Max?

Max:  No, we’re meeting up with all the other competitors at a Peggy the Perky Pie Princess’s baking seminar. She’s famous for preventing baking disasters.

Tonya: Can she prevent your type of disasters?

TO BE CONTINUED