emotions – Divabetic

07/12/202407/12/2024

Seen and Heard

Everyone wants to be seen and heard. Recently, Ledisi shared her struggles on social media about not being seen or heard by the R&B music industry.

“Talked to a writer about my name not being mentioned enough in musical spaces. I said, “I’m consistently ignored from conversations about music. Especially R&B Music. It’s hurtful after devoting my life to this genre and music as a whole. I get over it. I think about the Legends before me, who are still ignored choosing to move forward. Thats what it’s all about. Going where you are loved. In the end my art will speak for me. That’s all the matters. Do this for the music. Not popularity,” said Ledisi.

Her message hit home with fans who quickly expressed their support. Ledisi received many comments, texts, and phone calls that moved her. She said she posted her comment to be transparent and to inspire others.

Interestingly, Ledisi has won a GRAMMY Award and has been praised for her commitment to authenticity. So, in many ways, you might be scratching your head, wondering what she is upset about. Her post underscores that we all long to be seen and heard from time to time.

It’s not always easy to open up about your diabetes and express your challenges and pitfalls. However, expressing yourself can help alleviate your frustration.

If you don’t feel like you’re being seen or heard, take a moment to notice and listen to someone in your life. Pat them on the back, compliment their style, appreciate their talents, admire their perseverance, recognize their positivity, encourage their efforts, and congratulate them for making art.

05/02/202405/02/2024

Ledisi’s “I Blame You” Inspires Diabetes Discussion

Music can inspire conversations about different life topics, even ones that are different from the song lyrics. For example, Ledisi’s hit song, “I Blame You,” is an upbeat track about loving someone so good that you have no choice but to keep loving them. With song lyrics, “I blame you each and every day, It’s your fault that I’m completely blown away, You’ve been building castles in the sky, A place for only you and I, I, I, I”, who wouldn’t want to be told that you make someone you love to feel loved, and feel joy, how beautiful is that?

Words have power, especially when put to music. You can find yourself singing along to a chorus without even knowing what you’re saying. Repeated listening to a song can trigger random associations that slip into your subconscious and support or hinder your actions. This is why self-reflection is crucial. It allows us to understand how our words and thoughts impact our actions and, ultimately, our diabetes management.

Imagine if we ‘reframed’ Ledisi’s song title, which means changing the perspective or context to refer to the words you might find yourself saying about your diabetes daily. For example, instead of ‘I Blame You ‘, we could think of it as ‘It’s All My Fault’ or ‘I Gave Myself Diabetes ‘.

Blame and shame are the two biggest culprits that often sabotage your ability to manage your self-care. It’s not hard to imagine that these negative thoughts can slip into their minds without much effort. The light might be green, but we can still see red if we’re in the midst of despair. It’s a struggle to keep the negative self-talk at bay when you find yourself in the valley rather than at the peak of the mountain top.

How can you succeed at making lifestyle changes if your starting point begins with a negative mindset?

Regret, despair, anger, and frustration are the common emotions people experience when they’re initially diagnosed with diabetes. But here’s the thing: some people can overcome these emotional obstacles and improve their quality of life, while others cannot.

Many people who make and sustain changes to improve their care cite their children and grandchildren for giving them a reason. Others feel they have no choice but to change and return to the quality of life they once enjoyed.

What is your experience? We encourage you to share your thoughts and feelings about the impact of negative self-talk on your diabetes management. Your insights could be valuable to others in our community.

07/29/2020

31 Days of Divabetic Podcasts, Day Twenty Nine

Divabetic (Divabetic.org) presents a month-long showcase celebrating 10 years of diabetes podcasting. Each of the featured podcasts spotlights our favorite guests, topics, poems, games and/or musical inspiration. Enjoy!

On Day 29, we’re spotlighting Divabetic’s Diabetes Late Nite Inspired by Ricky Martin podcast from June 2019.

We’re talking about ‘Diabetes & Pride’ with musical inspiration from Ricky Martin.

Since Ricky Martin came out in 2010, he’s been a prominent voice for LGBT rights both in the U.S. and in his native Puerto Rico. Ricky Martin said, “I just wanna be free,” upon receiving GLAAD’s Vito Russo Award, which honors gay entertainers who promote equal rights. Martin opened up his life to Vanity Fair in its April 2012 issue and spoke candidly about his twins, Matteo and Valentino, and his longtime partner, Carlos Gonzalez.

This year marks the 50th anniversary of Stonewall Uprising (June 29, 1969). It is widely considered to be the single most important event leading to the gay liberation movement.

Diabetes can have a serious psychological and emotional impact, and can affect self-management as well as the individual’s quality of life. It has been reported that low levels of self-esteem have been associated with diabetes and diabetes management. Evidence shows that self-esteem can be a key factor influencing health care behaviors.

Low self-esteem is the prime driver of self-harm among gay and lesbian students reports Psychology Today.

For the first time, a new study, “Psychological Correlates of Self-Harm within Gay, Lesbian and Bisexual UK University Students,” reports that low self-esteem may have a bigger influence on self-injury behaviors than depression or anxiety.

How does being gay or bisexual affect your diabetes self-care? And what’s it like to be gay, lesbian, bisexual and/or transgender living with diabetes?

As an openly gay man, Mr. Divabetic is honored to shine the spotlight on members from the LGBTQ+ community living with diabetes. Guests include Stephen Bernstein, Greg Rubin, Maria Salazar, Maya James and the Charlie’s Angels of Outreach.

Our monthly podcasts are dedicated to Music Lovers living with, at risk and/or affected by diabetes. We aim to be the epicenter of the circle of care, a link between patients and their health care providers, a translator of clinical speak and a bridge between denial and acceptance, fear and confidence

Divabetic was inspired by the late music legend, Luther Vandross and created in 2005 by Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek, who, as Vandross’ assistant of 14 years, witnessed his boss, mentor, and friend struggle in silence and solitude with the diabetes and its related complications. Since its inception, Divabetic has presented outreach programs in 15 major U.S. cities, reaching hundreds of thousands of women, their families and health care professionals.

Experience more of our GLAM MORE, FEAR LESS philosophy at divabetic.org

07/23/202007/23/2020

31 Days of Divabetic Podcasts, Day Twenty Three

On Day 23, we’re spotlighting Divabetic’s Diabetes Late Nite ‘The Angry Show’ podcast from August 2016. We’re discussing how common it is to feel angry about a diabetes diagnosis with musical inspiration from Evelyn “Champagne” King.

We all know what anger is, and we’ve all felt it: whether as a fleeting annoyance or as full-fledged rage.

Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But keeping your temper in check can be challenging especially while managing your diabetes.

Diabetes is the perfect breeding ground for anger. Anger can start at diagnosis with the question, “Why me?” You may dwell on how unfair diabetes is: “I’m so angry at this disease! I don’t want to treat it. I don’t want to control it. I hate it!”

One reason diabetes and anger so often go hand in hand is that diabetes can make you feel threatened. Life with diabetes can seem full of dangers – insulin reactions or complications. When you fear these threats, anger often surges to your defense.

While it’s true that out-of-control anger can cause more harm than good, that’s only part of the story. Anger can also help you assert and protect yourself. You can learn to use your anger. You can even put it to work for better diabetes care.

Ready to get your anger under control? Are you ready to recognize, sit with, and move beyond the triggers that cause destructive anger.

Podcast guests include Author of “Overcoming Destructive Anger” Dr. Bernard Golden PhD, Dr. Lori Shemek PhD, Susan Weiner MS, RD, CDE, CDN, Laura Laria MA, CASAC-T, Jill Knapp- Woolsey, Poet Lorraine Brooks, Mama Rose Marie, and the Charlie’s Angels Outreach.

Throughout the podcast we will be playing selected songs from The Essential Evelyn “Champagne” KIng courtesy of SONY Music.

Divabetic was inspired by the late music legend, Luther Vandross and created in 2005 by Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek, who, as Vandross’ assistant of 14 years, witnessed his boss, mentor, and friend struggle in silence and solitude with the diabetes and its related complications. Since its inception, Divabetic has presented outreach programs in 15 major U.S. cities, reaching hundreds of thousands of women, their families and health care professionals.

Experience more of our GLAM MORE, FEAR LESS philosophy at divabetic.org

07/20/2020

31 Days Of Divabetic Podcasts, Day Twenty

On Day 20, we’re spotlighting Divabetic’s Diabetes Late Nite Inspired by Meghan Trainor from 2015.

Megan Trainor’s break-out hit, “All About That Bass” features lyrics about body acceptance. In this case, the bass is a metaphor for the booty. “Yeah it’s pretty clear, I ain’t no size two / But I can shake it, shake it like I’m supposed to do,” she sings.

How well are you at accepting the fact that you’re living with diabetes? Negative emotions such as anger, frustration, hopelessness, fear, guilt and shame is very common among people with diabetes. Navigating your way through a range of emotions as well as learning to accept your diagnosis can prove to be a major stumbling block for many people’s daily diabetes self-care management.

Guests include: Dr. Beverly S. Adler, PhD, CDE, Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE, Poet Lorraine Brooks and Mama Rose Marie.

Divabetic was inspired by the late music legend, Luther Vandross and created in 2005 by Max ‘Mr. Divabetic’ Szadek, who, as Vandross’ assistant of 14 years, witnessed his boss, mentor, and friend struggle in silence and solitude with the diabetes and its related complications. Since its inception, Divabetic has presented outreach programs in 15 major U.S. cities, reaching hundreds of thousands of women, their families and health care professionals.

Experience more of our GLAM MORE, FEAR LESS philosophy at divabetic.org

06/27/202006/27/2020

8 Types of Intimacy with Janis Roszler

We’re talking about the 8 Types of Intimacy with special guest: Janis Roszler on Divabetic’s free Indoor Scavenger Hunt & Smoothie Party on Zoom on Thursday, July 16, 2020, 7 – 7:30 PM, EST. Register

How does the fact that you have (your partner has) diabetes affect your relationship with your partner, positively and/or negatively?

Many people readily admit that living with diabetes can complicate and strain even the most loving and open relationships. The mood swings and emotional demands of diabetes can affect relationships with friends, family, co-workers and partners. Having a chronic disease can both increase the need for emotional support and increase the potential for frustration and tension.

No two relationships are exactly alike. However, different types of relationships have certain things in common. This might mean the types of feelings involved, the style of sex and intimacy of the couple, or even whether or not they live together.

We tend to focus on the sexual component in romantic relationships whereas but there are actually 8 different types of intimacy. Learning what they are can help you evaluate your relationship and what you can do to make your relationship a more intimate one.

8 Types of Intimacy

Affection (not sexual): Thank your partner for something they do. Say, “I love you” or “I’m so glad we are together.” Give them a hug and quick kiss when they arrive home from work.
Physical (not sexual): Go for a walk, swim, or bike ride together. If you have a ping pong table, challenge your partner to a game or two.
Aesthetic: Go outside and watch the sunset together. Stroll through an art gallery and view the paintings. Join your partner in the den and ask Alexa to play a song you both enjoy.
Spiritual: Pray or meditate together. Discuss a spiritual topic, attend church or synagogue together
Intellectual: If you share political views, discuss the 2020 election. Or, talk about a topic you recently heard or read about.
Social: Go out to a restaurant, see a movie, double date with friends, etc.
Emotional: Share your feelings about something.
Sexual: Shower together, share a bubble bath, or more.

Janis Roszler MFT, RD, LD/N, CDCES, FAND will be sharing insight about the 8 types of intimacy during Divabetic’s Zoom Party. Janis is the AADE 2008-2009 Diabetes Educator of the Year 2008 -2009, Board Certified Sex Therapist, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Fellow of the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics and Author and/or Co-Author of: Intimacy & Diabetes (ADA, 2020); Approaches to Behavior (ADA,2015); Diabetes On Your OWN Terms (Marlowe & Company, 2007); Sex and Diabetes (ADA, 2007); The Secrets Of Living And Loving WITH Diabetes (Surrey Books, 2004).

If you have diabetes, you may be looking for guidance on this sensitive subject. Intimacy & Diabetes is here to give help and advice where you need it.

Intimacy & Diabetes by Janis Roszler, LMFT, RD, LD/N, CDE, FAND; and Donna Rice, MBA, BSN, RN, CDE, FAADE. e-book: $9.99

BUY NOW

04/04/202004/04/2020

Getting Off the Diabetes Roller Coaster with Wendy Satin Rapaport PhD

Dr. Wendy Satin Rapaport aka ‘Diabetes Psyche’ has worked as a social worker and psychologist specializing in diabetes for twenty-eight years.

Dr. Wendy Satin Rapaport shares advice for getting off the roller coaster with time outs, structure, talking, using professionals, boundaries for people living with diabetes in this video:

Dr. Wendy Satin Rapaport

Dr. Wendy Satin Rapaport PhD joins us on April’s Diabetes Late Nite podcast scheduled for Tuesday, April 14, 6 -7:30 PM, EST. Tune in with this LINK.

Country music’s brightest star, Maren Morris inspires us to stay strong as we face the challenges of living with diabetes during the coronavirus pandemic. Podcast guests include Author of the Noodle Shop Mysteries: Vivien Chien, Lorraine Brooks, Sara (Mandy) Reece, PharmD, CDE, Dr. Wendy Satin Rapaport PhD, Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE, and Alexis Gray.

Throughout this podcast we will be featuring music from Maren Morris’s Girl album courtesy of SONY Music.

11/10/2018

‘Facing The Challenges of Living with Diabetes Everyday’ by Jessica Clark

Facing the challenges of living with diabetes everyday can be tough! And we’re not afraid to talk about it. You shouldn’t feel afraid either to express that ‘the struggle is real’ to friends, family and co-workers.

Need some inspiration for living ‘out loud’ about your diabetes?

Our Divabetic friend, Jessica Clark will stop by the studio to share her experience of living with the up’s and down’s of type 1 diabetes on November’s Diabetes Late Nite. Join us here on Wednesday, November 14 from 6 – 7:30 PM. CLICK HERE

Recently Jessica shared a very personal post on FB describing one of her saddest and most sincere diabetes moments. Below is what Jessica wishes you knew about her, the diabetes edition:

Every minute of my life is a calculation. And if it wasn’t, or I did it wrong, it can mean long-term tragic consequences. Even death.

I don’t feel good. Ever.

If I tell you I don’t feel good, then I REALLY don’t feel good.

It never works the way I want it to.

I can do the same thing every day, every detail, and have it still come out differently or wrong.

No one understands it.

But everyone is an expert on it.

I get judged for it.

It ruined my self-esteem.

Nothing is easy or straightforward

It changed me as a person, and sometimes I hate that.

I wonder how things could have been different if I didn’t have it.

I wonder what I would physically look like if I didn’t have it

I’ve been made fun of by my family and those closest to me regarding it

No matter what, I am seen as a complainer, wet blanket, trying to get attention, etc.

I go to bed every night not really knowing if I will wake up

I’m treated medically by people who learned how to care for me in books that are decades old

It’s fucking expensive to keep me alive

I feel like a burden physically and financially on people

I spend more to stay alive than people realize, even with insurance.

Giant for-profit corporations dictate the care I can receive and my quality of life.

A cure wouldn’t be profitable

My life is “managed” or “controlled”

Once you aren’t little or cute, few people genuinely care or help.

I’ve lost feeling in all of my fingertips.

I am diagnosed as “significantly visually impaired” because of it. Poor vision and night vision in my left eye. No peripheral vision, depth perception, or night vision in my right eye.

It isn’t easy or simple

It isn’t just eating well or working out

People judge and criticize my food choices.

My skin doesn’t get thicker or tougher to harsh remarks

I have to be “rude” and turn down items I can’t or shouldn’t have. (But then if I do have them, get judged or questioned, see above)

I subsequently make people feel “shitty” once I tell them why I can’t have said item.

But mostly, it’s lonely.

It’s really really lonely.

Here are several more of Jessica’s FB posts illustrating how ‘the struggle is real’ for millions of people living with type 1 diabetes:

“Diabetes awareness month real life post! Today was so shitty. Cracked windshield, dead (expensive) battery, so many things. I’m exhausted! Buuuut it’s 11pm and my blood sugar is 48 and I’m TIREEEDDD. But I can’t go to bed, because I might die. Sooo I’m not hungry or thirsty, but I’m drinking a juice box, eating to save my life. And this isn’t a once in a life time dramatic post. This is weekly, monthly. This is my ugly tired 11pm post of diabetes. This is T1D life. Jdrf one walk shirt was not planned lol.” – Jessica, November 2, 2018, 10:07 PM

“Most days, you control the diabetes. Some days, it controls you. Today was that day for me. It’s scary, and painful, but it’s not often. Bad enough I had to leave work, BG high enough I *probably* should have seen an ER (I didn’t, can’t afford healthcare costs. That’s another story. Lol) Shout out to all of my diabetic friends out there living through this shit we have to deal with.” – Jessica, October 10, 2018 at 4:16 PM

“This is the diabetes you don’t see. Tired, ready for bed, low blood sugar. Every time you test it drops lower and lower, and you keep treating and treating. You can’t breath, you’re confused, and your tired! But you can’t sleep, because if you sleep before it’s safe, you might not wake up. This is real. This is my life, every minute, of everyday, to some degree. This is the me you don’t see.” – Jessica, September 30, 2018

“Waking up to messages, comments, shares, from around the world is amazing, and I thank all of you. The gratitude I have, to have this life, and all of you in it is amazing. It is no secret that I am a “loud and proud” diabetic. A sometimes (unapologetically) open book. I love being able to help share moments that are common threads in the Diabetic community, but that little or no one vocalizes. I love being able to express what others cannot, for various different reasons. I would like to continue to do more for the community, in any way I can. I plan to work on more blogs, podcasts, events, whatever. If you would like to join me, come on in!” – Jessica, November 7, 2018

“My reason for sharing these moments is not to put a rain cloud over Diabetes or Diabetics. It’s simply to show how STRONG and how Human we really are. Most diabetics face challenges no one will ever see or know. Giving a voice to some of the moments and emotions is so important. Letting others know your feelings, and offer their help is crucial in being able to LIVE this wonderful life.”– Jessica, November 10, 2018

We’re celebrating World Diabetes Day with musical inspiration from Aretha Franklin on Diabetes Late Nite scheduled for Wednesday, November 14, 2018, 6 PM, EST. Guests include Poet Lorraine Brooks, Dr. Wendy Satin Rapaport, Diabetes Strong’s owner Christel Oerum, Beautyphonics CEO and “Beneath The Makeup”Author Suzanne Perez, Jessica Clark, Coach the Cure Health Educator Trisha Artman, and the Charlie’s Angels of Outreach. Throughout the podcast we will be playing music from Aretha Franklin’s ‘Aretha Franklin Sings the Great Diva Classics’ courtesy of SONY Music. TUNE IN

Diabetes Late Nite is a fast-paced, full-filled hour of diabetes education and wellness advice that encourages listeners to “laugh a little, learn a lot.”

https://youtu.be/tcpky_48Z7g

11/16/201611/16/2016

Pushing Past the ‘Shame’ Associated with Diabetes

‘What did you do?’

‘You must have eaten something bad!’

These types of condescending and mean-spirited comments are common from family members of people living with diabetes who are experiencing high blood sugar values. From blame to shame, overcoming the stigma of living with diabetes seems to be the biggest roadblock to living well with diabetes. Not only must someone with diabetes cope with the stress of day to day self-care management, they also must contend with the stigma of having a condition that even doctors don’t really understand.

For example, most people with diabetes know that high blood sugars aren’t just a result of what’s on the end of your fork. You can experience high blood sugar values because of a urinary tract infection, or depression, or from a fight with a spouse or children or anxiety over not being able to pay your rent.

A 2014 poll for the diaTribe Foundation reports that most people people with diabetes feel stigmatized by the condition regardless of its origins. And the burden of shame makes it harder to handle the ongoing diabetes self-management required to stay healthy and avoid complications.

“Many people not only feel stigmatized by the disease, but see their diabetes as a character flaw,” says Susan Guzman, a clinical psychologist and co-founder of the Behavioral Diabetes Institute.

“We try to make people understand that they may have contributed to their diagnosis, but it is not all their doing,” says Divabetic Club – Philly leader, Neva White DNP, CRNP- BC, CDE, as reported in the Philadelphia Inquirer.

“We talk about how we need to rethink having diabetes. How can I use this new information as a catalyst not only to change my lifestyle but maybe to change other things?,” she adds.

“I tell people that your numbers are your power and that they help you make your next move,” says Neva White.

“When you don’t take your blood sugars, it’s like driving a car and not knowing how fast you’re going. You can use the number to see what it is after you go to the gym, not only when you ate chocolate cake.”

What’s behind the number on your glucose meter?

“There are so many variables: stress, financial problems, poor access to health care, inability to pay for medications, someone who is forgetful or not organized, depression and mental illness,” says Susan Guzman, a clinical psychologist and co-founder of the Behavioral Diabetes Institute reports the Philadelphia Inquirer.

REGISTER NOW: Divabetic Club in Philadelphia, PA. Our next meeting is Thursday, December 15, 2016, 12 PM -1 PM.

LISTEN NOW: November’s Diabetes Late Nite hosted by Mr. Divabetic. We’re talking about overcoming the shame and blame of experiencing a diabetes health-related complication such as lower limb amputation with musical inspiration from Ella Fitzgerald.