On a perfect autumn day, Max and our team arrive at the Central Park Zoo to compete in the Annual Giant Gingerbread Man Cookie Jamboree. This prestigious baking competition boasts a $10,000 grand prize and benefits the zoo. Central Park Zoo’s origins date back to the 1860’s when New Yorkers donated their unwanted pets, like a black bear cub in 1859.
Today Central Park Zoo is home to a wide range of animals including Red Pandas, Sea Lions, Penguins, Fish, Birds, Lizards and Snow Leopards.
Max weaseled his way into the baking competition with the help of his friend and Zoo Discovery Guide volunteer, Agnes Frumpster. Now, the only thing standing between Max and the culinary crown are the three celebrity judges: Chew TV’s most beloved blonde Chef, the Queen of Cream, Sweet Sally Buttercup, Sally’s twin sister and professional wrestler Natasha ‘Knock-Out’ Buchanan and the dashing, former New York City Councilman Skeeter Jones who is more famous for his love life than for his legislation. Let’s hope Max has what it takes to win the Grand Prize. The competition’s about to start!
Agnes: Max, hurry up! The judges will be here any minute.
Max: Almost done, Agnes, I’ve got one more Snow Leopard spot to make on this cookie using chia seeds.
Tonya: Those are ‘spots’? I thought they were ‘bullet holes.’
Max: Just because you’re a mystery writer – you don’t have to read ‘BLOODY MURDER’ into everything I bake.
Tonya: Let’s face it, Max. You’ve been involved in so many murders, I wouldn’t be surprised to find a dead body under this table. What’s so special about chia seeds anyway?
MaryAnn: Chia seeds contain omega-3 fats and more fiber than other grain. They are also a good source of antioxidants and protein.
Patricia: And that amount of fiber can slow the absorption of sugar in your blood
Mama Rose Marie: Your Snow Leopard cookies are adorable and match my fur accessories.
Max: We’re going to need more cookies. Patricia, grab the extra container under the table.
Patricia: Sure. Oh, no! Their heads are broken off!
Tonya: I was right! You do have dead bodies under this table. This isn’t an accident, Max. It’s an omen. Something’s bad is going to happen. I can feel it!
Max: Quick! Hide the broken ones. Now, who wants some of my kale hot cocoa? Anyone? Mom?
Mama Rose Marie: Oh no, I’ll pass. You know I have an overactive bladder.
Max: How can you resist this earthy aroma? Mmm!
Tonya: Yuck. It smells like compost!
Max: But Almond Milk is so good for you! And I added kale to give it that EXTRA nutrient boost!
Patricia: He’s right. Almond Milk is rich in good fats which promote a healthy heart.
MaryAnn: And unsweetened Almond Milk is 50% lower in calories.
Mama Rose Marie: Can Almond Milk help strengthen my bones?
Patricia: No, it won’t. It doesn’t contain calcium. But kale does.
Tonya: You’re all nuts! No one’s going to taste that kooky combination, not even the judges. It smells awful.
Max: You don’t know what you’re talking about! My TV idol, Sweet Sally Buttercup will love my kale hot cocoa so much she’s going to make a big donation to Divabetic. You’ll see!
Patricia: How can you be so sure?
Max: I left a stack of donation requests in her dressing room earlier.
Patricia: She stars in a TV show, publishes a magazine and still has time to judge a Gingerbread Man contest! How does she do it?
MaryAnn: And she just introduced her own line of Buttercup bottled fruit juices.
Agnes: I’ll tell you. She does it by driving everyone crazy! Her list of demands was a mile long. I don’t care if these Gingerbread Men have heads or not, I want one NOW!
Max: Help yourself.
Agnes: No one else knows this but Sweet Sally’s been receiving death threats. Now her sister, Natasha insists on wearing Diamonds!
MaryAnn: How can wearing expensive jewelry protect her sister?
Agnes: Not real diamonds. She has a pet python named ‘Diamonds’.
Max: Oh no! I’m petrified of snakes. Tell her to keep her ‘Diamonds’ away me.
Patricia: Max, you’re so dramatic. Agnes … how do the cookies taste?
Agnes: They’re no gluten-free blueberry lavender cheesecake. But go ask Renata Whisk. She’s a last-minute replacement in the competition.
Max: Oh, no, Renata Whisk is the last person I want to see! She blogged that the only people who like my food are six feet under!
Tonya: She has a point, Max. Your catering career is as ‘spotty’ as your cookies.
Mama Rose Marie: But they do match my handbag perfectly.
Patricia: Is that real leopard, Rose Marie?
Mama Rose Marie: Oh, Good Heavens, NO! This is ‘Fun Fur’. Where ARE the Snow Leopards anyway? I don’t see them.
Tonya: Yeah, Max. You said we’d be right next to their cage!
Agnes: Well, my new boyfriend, Damon moved Max’s station to the Tropical Rainforest Zone when he learned Sweet Sally and her sister love reptiles. Listen Max, it might help you win.
Max: Oh, no! We’re surrounded by retiles. Switch us back!
Agnes: You can’t move now – you’ll be disqualified before the judges even get here.
Tonya: I can’t wait to meet Former Councilman, Skeeter Jones. They say he’s a real lady killer.
MaryAnn: I’m surprised he’s even here. After all, he just lost his election.
Max: When do we meet your new boyfriend Damon? Agnes, you seem so happy.
Agnes: I am! I finally found my Prince Charming after kissing so many frogs – and he’s a zoologist!
Mama Rose Marie: Speaking of frogs, these little colorful ones over here are adorable. Look!
Enjoy Divabetic’s 6th Annual Mystery podcast, Gingerbread Men Prefer Blondes features Mama Rose Marie, Best-Selling Author Tonya Kappes, the Charlie’s Angels of Outreach (Patricia Addie-Gentle RN, CDE and MaryAnn Nicolay BA, DTR), The Happy Diabetic Chef Robert Lewis, Seveda Williams, Coach The Cure’s Trisha Artman, Jillian Walsh, Wendy Radford, Dave Jones, Lorraine Brooks and Max Szadek.
Throughout this podcast we will be featuring music from the original Broadway cast recording of Gentlemen Prefer Blondes courtesy of SONY MUSIC.